1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
3. sexual passion or desire.
4. a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person; sweetheart.
5. (used in direct address as a term of endearment, affection, or the like): Would you like to see a movie, love?
6. a love affair; an intensely amorous incident; amour.
7. sexual intercourse; copulation.
8. (initial capital letter) a personification of sexual affection, as Eros or Cupid.
9. affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love of one’s neighbor.
10. strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: her love of books.
11. the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.
The ancient Greeks and Romans had several different words for love .
The Japanese and Buddhists have two.
Love is not just a word or a feeling. Science has shown that our bodies actually respond to this affliction. Neurotransmitters respond, hormones are released, goosebumps, palpitations.
Love has been the Muse of writers for thousands of years.
Aristotle said that “Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.”
Virgil proclaimed that “love conquers all.”
According to Chinese proverb, “a heart that loves is always young.”
Shakespeare proclaimed his love of Love time and time again in his plays and poems.
Dr. Suess explains that one knows they are in love “when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
Well doc, I can never sleep, but I am pretty sure it has nothing to do with love.
Or does it?
I had every intention of writing about my desire to fall in love, but I sat here for about 45 minutes unable to type anything further.
A friend told me that before I start trying to figure out who my great love was, I needed to figure out who *I* was.
I am now watching the “Sex and the City” movie for the 90th time (and the second time tonight) and something Samantha says is sticking out:
“I’m gonna say the one thing you aren’t supposed to say. I love you…but I love me more. I’ve been in a relationship with myself for 49 years and that’s the one I need to work on.”
I do not think I have actually ever loved myself. Maybe when I was a kid. I have moments where I think I am f*cking awesome, but they never last and I always go back to thinking about how much I suck.
I have a penchant for dwelling on all of my failures, mistakes and wrongs.
I constantly compare my life to others who are doing better and that are happier (or seem happier) than I am.
So, the new question I find myself needing to answer:
How do I fall in love with myself?